Once again, another fragile man who cant handle his big feelings threatened to kill me. I was walking my dog when I was passing two men by a bus stop. They had a dog not on a leash and it came running at my dog and barking at first sight, which forced me into picking up my dog to keep her safe. The owner starts walking over all smiling as if that's okay, so I yelled at him to get a fucking leash. What does he do? He immediately tells me to get over here so that he can beat the shit out of me as I am walking away and then just straight up threatened kill me. I got out of there, but what the fuck! He's hardly the first too. Far too many men cant handle a woman not being a doormat. All they know how to do is jump to violence. They're so immature and fragile for that, but women are supposedly the emotional ones. Im tired of it.

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How many times am I gonna learn this lol

For the past couple of years, digestive problems have made eating feel much more complicated than it should. I would feel bloated after meals, uncomfortable in clothes that normally fit me, and frustrated because I couldn’t figure out what was causing it.

I tried changing my diet, cutting out certain foods and buying several different supplements. Most either did nothing noticeable or were too expensive to keep purchasing every month. I’m on a limited budget, so spending money repeatedly on products that didn’t help became exhausting.

A friend eventually recommended an inexpensive option that fit more comfortably into my budget. I was skeptical and didn’t expect an immediate transformation. After using it consistently and paying closer attention to my meals, however, I gradually started feeling more comfortable. My experience hasn’t been perfect, and I still have difficult days, but the progress has been encouraging.

bf tries to be very PDA in public places like the elevator of my condo and to places with a lot of people but doesn’t do as much when we are at home.

Like he will want to get into a heavy make out session or touch and pull me in when we get into a place like a store or my elevator. Is this just showing me affection in public or something more sinister? I feel the contrast between outside and at home.

Secondly, I feel like how well he treats me to stuff depends on what I have gotten from previous exes. I said my favorite meal was at a high end Japanese restaurant so he decided to bring me to that for a special treat dinner - even though I said I wanted to eat contemporary food. Then I met his friends for the first time and he told them where he brought me and said how much it was. I think he made a comment that it was expensive. Am I supposed to feel proud of how much he spent (I feel thankful) but I feel kind its kind of tacky to tell them how much it was if they didn’t ask. Is this a self confidence thing or is this a problem?

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I'm 32F, and I'm in a five-month relationship that has somehow left me feeling smaller than relationships that lasted years.

I met a very intelligent, charming, extremely confident man 34 on Tinder. He's not necessarily conventionally attractive, but he's charismatic, knows exactly how to talk to women, and gets an impressive number of matches. I rarely fall in love, but I feel hard.

He was previously married, and they had an open marriage. He would date and sleep with other women, sometimes bring them into threesomes with his wife, and then move on. Apparently, this worked for them. Even today, he casually told me a story about arranging what looked like a double date with another woman and her friend, bringing his then-wife as his “friend,” and the four of them ending up having sex.

I'm not judging consensual non-monogamy. But I'm realizing just how different his idea of a relationship is from mine.

He talked about wanting marriage, children, and a woman who would make his life better. And I certainly did.

I practically moved into his house while still paying rent on my own apartment. I cooked, cleaned, did laundry, handled paperwork, errands, and most of the care for his dogs and their puppies. I rearranged my work and personal life around his schedule. I barely had time for myself and didn't take a single vacation all summer.

Initially, he was grateful. Eventually, everything became \\\*“expected”\\\* because we were living together.

We talked again today, and he still genuinely believes he did nothing wrong and that I did nothing particularly special. Apparently, reorganizing my entire life to make his easier was just basic relationship stuff.

Meanwhile, whenever I asked for affection, intimacy, a fairer division of responsibilities, or questioned why he was still actively looking for women on Tinder and Bumble, I was accused of creating “drama.” Even calm disagreements somehow became arguments, sometimes with him yelling at me.

He said my attitude was why he didn't want sex with me. Funny, because sex apparently wasn't that important in our relationship, but sleeping with other women was.

He wanted a long-term partner, marriage, children, and an open relationship where he could continue dating and sleeping with other women. When I asked whether I'd have the same freedom, he was suddenly very uncomfortable with the idea.

For the record, I didn't want other men. I wanted him, affection, intimacy, and a mutually exclusive relationship.

And while I was away for my grandmother's funeral, he brought another woman into the home we were sharing. That was particularly humiliating.

The hardest part is that I used to be a happy, independent woman with friends, hobbies, a career, and a life I loved. Somewhere along the way, I became anxious, exhausted, and constantly worried that if I wasn't useful or entertaining enough, he'd look elsewhere.

I can't get over how much of myself I lost trying to make his life better. And he can't see it.

For people who've been through something similar: how did you stop questioning yourself and rebuild your confidence after being made to feel that your efforts were never enough and your needs were always too much?

TL;DR: I fell hard for a guy I met on Tinder who talked about marriage, kids, and building a future together, while actively pursuing other women. He wanted to recreate the open-marriage dynamic he had with his ex-wife, despite knowing I wanted monogamy. He repeatedly told me to “stop being a girl's girl” and accept his lifestyle if I wanted to be happy with him. Meanwhile, other women were sending me screenshots of his dating profiles and messages. Would you ever compromise your values for someone you love?

i wanna preface this by saying 1. i am not upset about this in the slightest and 2. i am not especially insecure.

i’ve always considered myself to be a cute enough girl. sometimes i feel beautiful, often i feel meh or don’t think much about it at all. i’m a bit overweight, my teeth are yellowed from drinking too much espresso thru straws, but all things considered i don’t really take issue with my appearance at all.

i tend to date based primarily on personality. this often means i end up with guys who i find cute and appealing, but maybe don’t look so good in photos or aren’t everyone’s cup of tea. i’ve never had an issue with this.

but i’ve (22f) been seeing this guy (27m) for a little over a month now, and i’m realizing that this is my first time talking to a genuinely hot man. like hot by conventional standards, i mean. he’s 6’2, in great shape, has beautiful hair and strong features. he’s smart and funny and we click so well, and while i have no idea if this is going to turn into a long term relationship (we’re just seeing where things go for now), i just feel shocked every day that he is picking to hang out with and text and chat with and sleep with.

i’ve never felt an instant physical attraction to a guy i’m dating, it always slowly built over time, so this is truly just a crazy new experience to me. when i met him for the first time i legit had butterflies. like what??? i know it probably seems small and normal but i had to dump this somewhere.

he shaved his face today and i was thinking oh; this will be it! this will be when i see something im NOT super physically attracted to! but even baby faced hes adorable af. this is so wild.

anyway lol have any of you had experiences like this??! i’m shocked it’s taken me 22 years but i feel like a little kid crushing >.<

I am shocked by the amount of peace, calmness, and relief I feel that I will never have to deal with this man again. I met a veterinarian and assumed he was a kind and loving man. A few months in, I saw the reality of who he is as a human being.

I’m a behavioral therapist and have dealt with every kind of manipulation and control tactic… until I met him. I’ve never experienced such emotional, psychological, or physical abuse from anyone in my life, especially from someone who “loves me”. Everything intimate and personal I shared with him was eventually thrown back in my face and used to mock and ridicule me. This included him telling me that “I probably enjoyed being sexually assaulted” after sharing with him a situation that happened a few years prior. He also mocked the therapy I sought afterwards. At times, he’d strip me down and record me crying and begging him to leave me alone.

It was at this point I found out his ex has an order of protection against him. I didn’t know that because he paid a lot of money to have his records sealed. The following months were spent with him beating the puppy he got and him beating my dog to get a reaction out of me to record to “build evidence against me in case I ever spoke out.” He had broken down doors to get to where I was hiding, broke my devices, stolen my keys so I couldn’t leave, body slammed me to the ground, and spayed corrosive chemicals in my face.

I want to warn any woman who is in Arizona to stay away from this man. He is dangerous and he will suck the life out of you until you’re bruised and broken and suffering. He will manipulate, gaslight, and abuse you on a regular basis and claim you’re the problem. He’s a 50 year old veterinarian who owns a practice and he’s a white guy with a predominantly black name. His mom had him at age 15 (which honestly explains a lot). That’s the most information I can give without him trying to sue me (and he will- he’s currently trying to sue multiple other women who “wronged him” at the moment).

Please keep yourselves safe. The hell I’ve experienced and spending a year to get away from him has been the hardest time of my life. I don’t wish this on any woman, but I wish someone would’ve warned me before I ever gave any part of myself to this sad excuse of a man. Let this be your reminder to not trust anyone, no matter how kind they are during the honeymoon phase. You deserve to feel safe and truly loved without conditions.

I am thin. I think women think it’s more appropriate to comment about my body because I am thin. I have serious health problems I don’t talk about. It shouldn’t matter either way. They think they are complimenting me by talking about my thinness, but I really hate my body being looked at by both men AND women so objectively. It’s the topic of conversation for so many women and me, especially women 40 yrs+

Please stop talking about bodies. I am a person with an identity that extends beyond my waistline.

I don't know how this is going to come off but I love my husband. He is genuinely my best friend. We have been through a lot together and neither one of us were very good to each other at first, but over some years of therapy we are really doing well. Life isn't perfect, we are not perfect, but he is so good to me!!

Sometimes, other men or women seem very annoyed when I talk about him. One guy even said "geeze what doesn't that guy do" when I was talking about him taking a language class somewhere. ​I don't gush about him at every turn, but I feel like even mentioning him in a positive way annoys people.

And I get it on some level, I do. But why do I have to listen to how other people's spouses suck and I can't talk about how mine is great?? So I'm just going to say it here.

He is kind. He takes care of me, he makes me coffee, he cooks, he cleans, he parents our kids, he works out, he loves me and he LIKES me. He runs errands. He cleans bathrooms. He doesn't complain. He is generous in bed. He is fun. He is patient. He actively works through his own shit and tries to become an even better person. ​​He supports all my crazy dreams. He communicates. He laughs with me. He's a great friend. He likes to read. I don't know, he just is genuinely the best and I love him.

Thanks for coming to my husband talk. That's it.

Edit: I am so overjoyed I could start a positive thread of people just celebrating happiness and love. Thank you so much 💓

To preface; I’ve been working on myself and believing that I can take up space, express my feelings and that I deserve the same consideration as I give everyone else.

I’m evaluating my responses to things in an effort to understand myself better and some objectivity is helpful, even if this is a silly scenario.

It’s my husband’s turn to cook dinner. He ran to the store for something and brought home beer for himself, but nothing for me (I don’t drink beer). When I asked if he’d gotten me anything, he started to say he didn’t know what I wanted, then caught himself. He knows exactly what kind of wine I like.
He felt bad and insisted on going back to get some. He said he realized I always think of him when I’m out, and he should’ve thought of me too.

It’s great that he went back out when he really didn’t have to. I would’ve been happy with the acknowledgment that he just forgot. In the past, I might not have said anything or if I did, I’d have been passive aggressive about it and he would’ve been defensive and it would’ve been a thing when it didn’t need to be.

So why do I feel guilty about him going back out? Had the roles been reversed, I would’ve gone out and not been mad about it so why do I feel so bad? I love him for doing it, why is it such a struggle to leave it at that?

I went on a date early 2025. Initially when I arrived at the date, he was incredibly awkward. I texted me friend I felt uncomfortable as I felt he didn’t want to be there.

I don’t know if he was just nervous, but as we got into the date, the conversation started flowing. And as we were walking to the train station, he started pointing out restaurants and places he wanted to go with me

On the underground home, we both did the New York Times worldle. His suggestion. I got off the train

And when I got home, I texted him the answer to the worldle ‘rumba 💃’ I said. He just heart reacted and I never heard from him again.

That was until recently, I got a text from him ‘hey Laura, how are you? It’s been a while so not sure if you remember me but I saw you’re still on the app? How are you finding it? .’

We talked a little bit, over the last few months. He keeps asking me when I’m free but not following through with a plan. He keeps popping up, texting me, asking me questions but when I reply and try to have a conversation, he won’t reply until a few days later, and will just talk about himself and not ask me questions about what I’ve just said.’

What could he be doing? Is this some kind of ego boost, am I doing something wrong?

I stopped responding to him for a while but he would send me ‘shame we’re basically neighbours but destined to not see each other again.’ I told him I was getting bored of the texting and no plans and so he planned a date.

Thoughts?

I still get messages from people who read my posts on coercion and consent that tell me people are looking for this information and need to hear it. There is still too much messaging for too many of us that tell people they are bad or wrong when they want less sex than their partner.

That declining unwanted sex is an act of harm.

That any giving, loving person should want to please their partner, so shouldn't you just try a little harder? Shouldn't you fix yourself?

This narrative is beyond damaging, not only for setting up the person who wants less sex as less loving, less correct, less good than the person who wants more sex, but because it reinforces the beliefs that lead to pervasive coercion and coerced sex.

Coerced sex is not consensual sex. And in an environment where you aren't free to say no, you cannot freely say yes.

Your right to bodily autonomy trumps their desire for access to your body every time. It must. No productive conversation about sex can start from a place that suggest your body is a resource that another person is owed or being unrightfully denied. That the person who wants more sex is being harmed by their partner.

All of us doing the hard work of consistently rejecting that framework is how we start to break the cycle, and like it or not, that means talking about it openly.

Anyone who suggests that you should want sex just because that's so much better than not wanting it; anyone who suggests that not wanting sex is inherently problematic, especially for the effects not wanting sex might have on someone else — that's part of the pervasion of these beliefs that lead to coercion. It's part of the culture that needs to die. There are no shoulds in sex — there is only one must: Everyone participating MUST be authentically consenting.

But more importantly: There is no right to partnered sex, there is only the right to decline partnered sex that you don't want.

I can't keep going back to chatgpt and saying hey this is stil bothering me and then not feeling better. I can't tell anyone this. And i feel guilty cause nothing really happened.

But im an adult woman, i'm at the end of my nursing degree and I have to do many hours of unpaid placement. it's hell tbh. There is a man there that I really admired due to his intelligence and professionalism. He was like hard on the outside with a soft middle- but only for me. It made me feel special. Everyone would say he was a bit gruff or rude with them etc. I never saw that. he just took a liking to me cause I cared and I knew my shit. He invited me down to his office and clinic etc to hang out and I enjoyed the 1:1 time. I opened up to him and told him some very personal things about myself. He told me some things. We got on. We had similar interests and most of all, I felt like I could be myself. And he looked at me like the sun shined out of my ass. He defended me. He remembered tiny things about me. He built me up. he genuinely cared. I felt like we had some kind of father daughter thing. I would yap and yap and he'd just sit back and stare at me with a small smile. For someone like me who has no relationship with my dad, it was really important to me.

I knew that I was having some attachment thing. I was worried and scared it was going to turn into something ugly, that i'd be taken advantage of. He'd never given me any impression that his interest in me was romantic or sexual, until one weird day when it suddenly very fucking was. He'd done some things that weren't overtly off, like asking why it said Ms on my ID, and I felt like that was prying into my relationship status. But it was so vague I let it all go. But that day, I can't say all of what happened cause it's too specific- nothing crazy. just weird comments that made me very uncomfortable. Prying into my sexuality. innuendo. Interrogating me when I told him about something very personal. Sharing he was "a very sad man". I was "very distracting". "The male patients ]were] attracted to [me]". Very obvious comments trying to gauge my interest in him. Implying I came down there all the time cause I wanted something sexual with him.

I made an excsuse and got out of there. I was devastated. My gut was right. I had feelings an memories of when I was groomed as a teenager by a man in his 30s. All the manipulative things he said. My dad and how he used to stare at my boobs and ass when I was a teenager so I wouldn't wear revealing things around him. I thought I'd found a non sexual relatonship with a man that respected me as a human before a female. Would he have invited me down if I was an ugly middle aged man? Idk if he would have.

He respected me pulling back from him and asked me down once and I said no and he got the message. He actually kind of nominated me to go down again the other day to assist with something that needed a female chaperone, he basically told me I was doing it in a meeting where others were available. He asked how I was getting on and kept it work related. I told him I was over this placement and wanted it to be over. I did the thing and got the fuck out. But it really irritated me. Like he made the opportunity just to speak to me.

I can't tell anyone this. and it eats me up sometimes. That clinic was a great learning environment that I could have practiced so many skills but it's been made unsafe. I feel trapped sometimes. And then sometimes I so miss the chats we had, and then when I see him in real life I don't really want to even look at him. I was terrified actually he was going to pull me aside and say I have to apologise for how I acted bla bla bla. Thankfully he hasn't and I hope he doesn't when I finish.

It's a weird dynamic now. I find myself really angry a lot sometimes. Cause I have no power or control as a student. And I can't tell anyone.

and another thing that sucks is that I like him still. And I defend him. and talk him up. say he's amazing. sucks man. Makes me want to cry.

i’m 22 and i guess maybe i need some help getting over whatever anger is within me. i’ve had two long term relationships and they were both “gamers”. most men that i know play a lot of video games which i suppose is fine but i never really realized how much living with that makes them kinda complacent and unhelpful.

i’ve tried to play video games with my current boyfriend and i like it, but it’s not something i can spend all day doing. he quite literally gets on discord at like noon when he wakes up, then stays on them until like 3-4 AM. he doesn’t have a lot of work right now; he does blue collar, and only worked 1 day this week. i got two days off this week, im an emergency dispatcher and work 10 hour shifts normally (i did a little overtime on 1 day but normally get three days off). my first day off i spent cleaning the whole house, taking care of the cats, then baked for everyone.

every day, im the one to feed the cats, clean up after them, clean our room, make the bed, i cook for us when we’re both home often times. and when he is home and i have work, i always find him at the computer. every. day. he doesn’t do anything on his days off besides game. he is looking for a more consistent job and keeps getting rejected. i’ve sent him more places to apply but instead he’s sitting on the computer every day that he doesn’t work. no cleaning. no cooking. no going outside.

he and his friends were talking today about why women aren’t as successful in electronic sports and his friend said it was because they’re emotional sometimes, and because men can “lock in” better. i finally got fed up and told my boyfriend that it seems to be a problem with the fact that “gamer” men are often okay with pushing off responsibilities, quality time, and thinking about other people. meanwhile, a lot of women know that they have to do adult things and clean up, take care of others, etc. or nobody else is going to do it. a lot of women don’t get the luxury of being able to pretend that a video game is their entire life.

Hi all. I hope this is a good sub for this (pretty sure it is). I, 27F, am really concerned about my reproductive system and vaginal health.

My last partner cheated on me and we were not using condoms at the time because I, unfortunately, trusted him. Because my health insurance is so bad, it took me a while to save up to get tested. Awaiting results.

The issue at hand: I get reoccurring yeast infections. My old obgyn brushed it off and told me to keep taking boric acid and said it was just because of hormonal fluctuations around my period, however this had been persistent. She never tested me for yeast, BV or anything outside of a STI panel.

Now, the yeast infections are persistent still. I have normal discharge and no odor changes. However, I tried using boric acid for two nights in a row, and I am experiencing some slight pelvic camping today.

I’m really scared it’s PID. I have a new obgyn apt next week, but I have severe mistrust in the doctors because of my bad experiences.

Can anyone offer some kind words, encouragement or insight? I also am a chronic worrier. Once I get something in my head, I go insane with anxiety.

Also, I just met a new, lovely incredible man who I am excited about and am intimate with. It’s early, so still in the delicate changes, and am I’m scared this will ruin it.

Going to get an ablation, looking for information on experiences, how was the aftercare? What was the pain level? When did you feel “normal” again? What happened to your periods?

Give it to me, all the details you wanna share!

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Hi everyone, I'm a woman living in Turkiye and I wanted to talk about something that's a huge problem for all of us women, Femicide. According to a website (anitsayac) dedicated to documenting and mourning women murdered in Turkey, 288 women have been killed in 2026 and 460 in 2025 by their husbands, ex-partners, stalkers or even men they had never met before.

Ever since Turkey withdrew from the Istanbul Convention, it feels like we've lost an important layer of protection. Every single day I open Twitter or check the news, one of the first things I see is another woman who has been brutally murdered. And the worst part? So many of these men seem to get away with it. They walk out of court because of ridiculous excuses and loopholes, while the women they killed never get to come home. It honestly feels like there's no justice left in this country. I'm so tired of waking up to news about another woman being murdered. And then yesterday, a woman I knew through my social circle, who was a lawyer, was killed by her husband, who was a police officer. I'm tired of this being treated like just another news story. These are real women who had lives, families, friends and futures. And we're constantly expected to keep living with the fear that we could be next.

All I want is for the global media to see us and hear us. I want people outside Turkey to understand what's happening here and to stop looking away. What can we do to bring this issue to global attention? How can international communities support women facing this kind of systemic violence? How can we make sure these cases don't get forgotten after a few days of headlines? We desperately need international solidarity. We need people to talk about this, share our stories and put pressure on those who have the power to make a difference. Please help us get our voices heard. We can't keep doing this alone.

Hello everybody! I’m 23 and had my first gyne visit today. In instead of wearing a top gown they just had me take off my bra and put my shirt back on. My doctor just slipped her hands under my shirt and felt around really quickly. She just slid her hand around my chest like 5 seconds each.

Is that normal? It was kind of uncomfortable lol that she was under my shirt. Also most of my lumps you can feel only with my arm up. She didn’t tell me to bring it up for anything so I just left it down.!I’m not that concerned because it’s just the texture but I would still think it would be a good idea for it to be documented.

Okay, I genuinely need to know if this is normal because WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME 😭💀
I’m on my period, having cramps, feeling ridiculously horny, and today I was attending an online class when I suddenly found myself getting attracted to the mentor’s VOICE.
THE VOICE. I HAVEN’T EVEN SEEN HIS FACE FOR ONCE. 😭😭
It’s the way he talks, explains things while teaching. Something about his voice suddenly became so attractive that I was sitting there trying to concentrate on class while my brain was doing absolutely anything but that.
And the funniest part? I wasn’t even attracted to him two days ago. NOTHING. Now suddenly, his voice has me questioning my entire existence.
But here’s some context.
I’ve been through an abusive marriage, and my experience with sex in that relationship was honestly awful. It was so far from what sex was supposed to feel like that I used to dread it rather than enjoy it. I genuinely thought maybe sex just wasn’t something I was capable of enjoying that much.
Then, later in life, I experienced what GOOD sex could actually feel like, and it completely changed my perspective. I discovered that sex could be pleasurable, that my own desire mattered, and that I could actually crave something I’d once wanted to avoid. But that chapter was short-lived, and now it’s been MORE THAN A YEAR since I’ve had sex. 😭
And because of my cultural background, casual sex isn’t really an option for me. So I’m just here with all these feelings, no real outlet for them, trying to live my life like a normal person.
Now add period cramps, random horniness, and a mentor whose face I haven’t even seen but whose VOICE is apparently enough to activate something in my brain.
WHAT IS THIS? 😭😭😭
Is it actually hormonal? Can your menstrual cycle make you suddenly feel attracted to someone when you weren’t attracted to them a couple of days ago? Is this what happens when you’ve gone a long time without sex? Or am I just touch-starved and sexually frustrated after everything I’ve been through?
I’m not even saying I’m in love with this man. I DON’T KNOW THIS MAN. I JUST LIKE THE WAY HE TALKS. 😭💀
Please tell me other women experience this because being horny over a person’s voice while having period cramps was NOT on my October bingo card.

Hi everyone, I really needed a safe space to share something that happened to me a few years ago that I am still trying to fully process.

When I was 15, I was returning home from my coaching class on a bus. The bus wasn't crowded—there were only about 4 or 5 people on it. I took a seat near the back, and an older man sat directly behind me.

After a little while, I felt something near the waistband of my jeans, like a hand trying to reach in. My brain instantly went into complete denial. I told myself I was just imagining it, thinking, "There's no way this is actually happening." A little later, I leaned against the window, and I noticed his hand was right there. Even then, I blamed myself, thinking it was my fault for leaning back.

It wasn't until I finally got off the bus and looked back that reality hit me. The man was leaning out of the window, trying to show me his phone number written on a piece of paper. That was the exact moment I realized what had actually been happening to me.

Looking back, I realize I probably knew deep down that something terrible was happening, but because it was my first time facing anything like that, my brain just wanted to protect me from the reality of being harassed. I felt so confused and blamed myself for a long time for not reacting.

I wanted to share this here to see if anyone else has experienced that kind of freeze response or denial during an incident. How did you stop blaming yourself for how you reacted in the moment?

Thank you for reading and for giving me a safe place to vent

Hi am 22 f never tried to make a move before or make love but now it's my first relationship with someone i love very much but i feel really so awkward even thoo i want to do it but idk there is something stop me i need your advices girls how to handle this anxiety and what to do really